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Architect of Despair

Woe is me, my mood is sour,
My heart is heavy, and my mind a mess.
I've done it again, an act so dour,
My eagerness, naught but a source of distress.

Love is beautiful, but it's bite quite dire.
When, upon refusal, a hollowness to condone.
Intentions wonderful, but their recipient like stone.
My feelings like ash, swept from a dead fire.

Every time, like a badly-closed wound,
I bleed profusely, beyond compare.
What else should I expect, my fate is bound,
I am my own Architect of Despair.
If it comes as a surprise, then SURPRISE! As of late, I have been feeling a bit melancholy. Getting home from work today, I had the sudden urge to write something poetic. Strangely, this mostly came out without any outside influence. I DID have to look up a few synonyms, however.

As for what it is about, I am sure it'll be fairly obvious if you read it. It's not a TSS-length kind of thing, so enjoy!
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:iconlevithion9538:
Levithion9538 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, this is sad yet shows what can and will or might become of those that share it. Bravo! Clap 
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much!  This was actually my very first poem... and I am glad that I don't often write sad or depressing ones anymore.
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:iconlevithion9538:
Levithion9538 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Anytime and yes because if you do write sad poems it often shows how your feeling. And yes you did Amazing for your first!
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:blushes:  I am far too chipper these days to write sad unless someone requests it!
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:iconlevithion9538:
Levithion9538 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:)
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Don't count on your stars poem to be sad. <3
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:iconlevithion9538:
Levithion9538 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
That is true.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Because it's going to be freaking magical!
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(1 Reply)
:iconlilithmae1231:
Lilithmae1231 Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Well, that hurt. I love the wording on this, it really emphasizes the feelings being conveyed very well. I love it. :)
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you again! =) I am thankfully not in this state of mind anymore, but I keep this around as a reminder...
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:iconlilithmae1231:
Lilithmae1231 Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome again! :) And I understand that completely.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:aww:
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:iconraxnae:
raxnae Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2013
yes I do like your other poems, you write a lot like me except I write mostly in free verse with neither care nor time for rhyme scheme lol.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love rhyming, and puns and such. So I try my very best to rhyme in my poetry as good as I can!
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:iconcrystallized-skies:
crystallized-skies Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Love this. I love how you changed the rhyme scheme as well. Just lovely.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
^_^ Thank you very much! I am happy you like this poem, for it was my first. o.o
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:iconcrystallized-skies:
crystallized-skies Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's a sign that you will be a good writer in both poetry and prose.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Speaking of that... I am also working on a novel! >_>
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:iconcrystallized-skies:
crystallized-skies Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You are? That's wonderful. I've aspired to write many a novel (and series) but just simply don't have the time to write such long pieces. How far are you? What genre is it?
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I would consider my novel to be High Fantasy, with influences from various cultures and places. There is a form of Magic in the world, and there are higher beings. However, I try my best to make everything fresh and entertaining. o.O
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:iconcrystallized-skies:
crystallized-skies Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Very interesting. I find today's books moving toward the future and supernatural beings so it's nice to see something more geared toward fantasy.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
If you have time, could you please check out the Prologue of my tale? I will happily link it to you. :meow:
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(1 Reply)
:iconcallingallmonsters:
CallingAllMonsters Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I really love this! I can't even describe how amazing it is. I liked especially your word choices, it felt like every word was meant to be there. Keep up the good work! :3
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much for your kind comment! ^_^ Could you look at my other poems as well, if you have the time?
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:iconcallingallmonsters:
CallingAllMonsters Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're very welcome(:
And I think I saw all that was there...let me know if I'm wrong!
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Did you check out the sub-folders too? I appreciate it alot that you're willing to look at my stuff. :)
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:iconcallingallmonsters:
CallingAllMonsters Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
There's sub-folders? Hmm. I'll go there now C:
As for looking at your stuff... anytime!^-^
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It's much appreciated! If there is ever anything you'd like me to look at, you only need to ask...
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:iconcallingallmonsters:
CallingAllMonsters Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
(:
Same to you, let me know when you have any new poems you'd like me to see.
I only have one new poem at the moment that you're more than welcome to check out.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Happily!
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(1 Reply)
:iconvanitysedge:
VanitysEdge Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Student Writer
WOW! This is a very beautiful piece! I can tell this must of came from a real life experience.

By the way just out of curiosity how do you request a critique?
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much. :meow: Well, you need to be a Premium Member to be able to do so officially. Though I, as a Critic, have come up with an alternate solution.
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:iconvanitysedge:
VanitysEdge Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Student Writer
And what is that :O
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I can send you a Note instead, and Critique a piece as if I were normally.
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:iconvanitysedge:
VanitysEdge Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! That sounds great!
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Just let me know what you'd like done, and I'll see what I can do.
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:iconvanitysedge:
VanitysEdge Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Student Writer
If you want to, send me notes. You don't need to leave me super long comments on the actual work notes with critiques telling me what you liked and what you didn't are enough. If anything, I would appreciate it most on my current novel.
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Got it! :)
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(1 Reply)
:iconnine-roses:
Nine-Roses Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I really enjoyed what I read. ^v^
I could really see the emotion you put in this! :wow: I loved it a lot!
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I am pleased to see that my first attempt at poetry was not too bad. ^_^ I was feeling a bit down on m luck that day. Thank you. :hug:
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:iconnine-roses:
Nine-Roses Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I like it! ^v^

I hope you're feeling a lot better now! :hug:
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I am a bit, hehe. Thank you for your kindness. ^_^
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:iconnine-roses:
Nine-Roses Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Anytime! ^v^
Glad to hear it's getting better!
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:iconmabusthedark:
MabusTheDark Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:meow:
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